I'm sitting here in my program office, attempting to work on my thesis, but someone just heated up some fish for lunch. There is something about the smell of fish... I will smell like this all day. Like I just ended my shift at Long John Silver. Like I just turned a trick and owe a pimp some money. Worst smell ever.
But slightly unrelated but not completely off base, my life has been a slight mess lately. And to break this down, it's due to 20% family, 30% school & 50% friends related issues. Sooo so much.
In an attempt to avoid any breakdowns (Read: Shambles & Cupcakes), I told TJ, my fiancé, that I just wanted to be alone and listen to music. So I close myself in our guest bedroom, put my iPod on the dock, and turn on shuffle.
The first (and only) song to play is "Lullaby (Rockabye)" by Shawn Mullins. You know it. Don't lie! I become immediately transfixed. Closed my eyes and sang along at the top of my lungs. I'm sure the neighbors could hear me through the walls, which is unfortunate because I played this song over & OVER, joining in every single time.
After maybe the fifth or sixth play (I KNOW!), I decide to turn it off and just enjoy the silence. Maybe only 60 seconds of silence... I hear yelled from outside the door, "PLAY 'IN YOUR EYES!'" And so I do.*
And I open up the door to find ALL my boys: TJ, Corey (my son), and Max (our dog) standing there and surprisingly not looking at me like I'm completely insane and this makes me smile.
Today, I'm still smiling, despite smelling like fish and still having 101 issues to deal with, because I have my boys, and they're safe & healthy & happy & love me even though I might be insane and that's all that really matters. Everything else I'll just sing away.
*I am 100% sure TJ thought these songs were sung by the same person. It was an odd choice otherwise. And don't judge me for having Peter Gabriel on my iPod in the 21st century.
